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The boomerang people


Everyone has a boomerang person in their lives at one time or another.

These are the people who drain you, push your buttons or seem to have a life mission to torment you. You love them, you hate them – you want them to leave, you want them to stay.

And then finally, you get up the courage to break away. You take a stand for your own well-being and say “never again!”

And then, before you know it – they boomerang right back into your life. Maybe its not a person with the same name and face as before, but it’s the same person all right. And before you know it, you’re caught up in the usual negative drama with a sickening feeling of déjà vu.

“Why me?” you wonder, thinking its not fair. But if you stop and look a little closer, you’ll see that the boomerang person in your life is persistent love in disguise.

Your boomerang relationships are here to help you with your own personal growth. You may resist this idea at first, but you can discover some surprising truths about yourself if you are willing to do the work.

Accept responsibility for the boomerang relationship.

The ONLY reason this person is in your life is because YOU have allowed this to be possible. At a deep level of your thoughts, you invited them to be here. You are NOT a victim and thinking of yourself as one will mask important truths. Shift the focus from who is wrong and to blame. Instead focus on what you are asking them to teach you.

Look at the boomerang person as a reflection of you.

The things that make you crazy about someone else always point to an issue you need to deal with personally. Don’t like how someone disrespects you? Then think carefully… is there someone you are disrespecting? Or are you disrespecting yourself? Do you need to recognize and deal with your sensitivity to criticism? The truth will jump out at you as you think through this connection.

Accept that the relationship is good and find forgiveness in the process.

After all the distress, it may be difficult to acknowledge that this person’s recurring presence in your life is a blessing. Trust that it is indeed, for your good. Think of this person as a teacher, sent to bring you an important life lesson. They are playing out their role in your life exactly as you have scripted. When you realize they are just doing their job, and that your best good is at the end of the lesson, you can find the forgiveness that comes from peaceful acceptance.

Share your love.

Remind yourself that your job is to love everyone, even those who cause you difficulty. Start quietly and privately if you have to, with prayers, or visualizations of the person surrounded in light and love. You might be surprised at how quickly this changes the situation.

Until you have uncovered what you are supposed to learn from the boomerang person in your life, they will keep coming back, over and over again. Look at the experience as blessing, not a curse, and your new perspective will uncover insights that help you feel more empowered, loving and peaceful.

Photo by Mahima H.

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